THOSE CRAZY BEARS

Funniest thing happened the other day. I was out for a dander on my local mountain when I came across a big group of bears. I’ve previously spoke about my unnatural fear of bears, so as you can imagine, I was quite taken back to come across this herd of brown bears just chillin’ in the middle of the path. Surprisingly, I didn’t panic, scream or wet myself. Funny how it all works out, when your confronted with you worst fear you just want to sit and have a cup of tea with it. Weird!
So I approached the one that appeared to be King of the herd and he motioned for me to pull up a rock. To be honest I was expecting a bit of a stand off. You know, Like when you join a new school and you have to prove yourself before you get any respect. But, surprisingly, these bears weren’t as aggressive as my old classmates.
Of course conversation was a bit stinted since they only spoke Japanese (and with a thick country accent), but we were able to communicate okay. After a while I could kind of sense they wanted to know what I was doing in their neck of the woods all alone. Not having the Japanese to express my great love of the outdoors I tried impressing them by walking on my hands. This worked a treat. A great icebreaker, soon the bears all lightened up and started showing off too. They turned out to be a real fun bunch, laughing and growling and slapping each other on the back with their big ole paws. Man, we had a blast.
After about thirty minutes of this horseplay (bearplay?) I told them that I was keen on making it to the top, so please excuse me. But in true Japanese hospitality they offered to accompany me all the way to the top. They brought me a different route this time and showed me lots of cool stuff including a tree that looks like it’s giving birth to a rock. Some serious nature loving going on there.

And at the top they showed me a couple of random rope swings. We had tones of run. Those crazy bears are as mad as me. After an afternoon of playing around I impressed them even further by sharing my cup noodles and flask of hot water. I can still see the cute expression of amazement on Daddy Bear’s face when I opened the flask and the steam wafted out into the cold autumn air. Adorable!I made my way back alone, happy and fearless. I’m now welcome to hike in any part of the mountain I like, and they’ve even honored me by asking that I check over the place once in a while as they’ll be hibernating soon.

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This story is a work of fiction. Please do not worry or inform my doctor.

SNOW WHITE

Recently we had our Junior High School culural festival. This a great day to enjoy Japanese culture as the students perform all kinds of dances and music, etc. Only working at the school two days a week (and not speaking Japanese) means I take very little to do with the preparation. However, last year I was asked to write a short version (with easy English) of Cinderella. So I did and along with the third year English elective class, we made a play. Of course they 'demanded' that I play the Prince, and being in a foreign country, I just didn't feel comfortable refusing. I was nervous before hand, but it turned out to be a lot of fun on the day.

So due to the 'raging success' (critics words, not mine), my skills were asked for again this year. This time round we did Snow White. It was tonnes of fun. The students made all the props and custumes, including my handsome pony, on top of all the other preparation they were doing. On the day, all went well, and I faultlessly and fluently executed my three lines in English. I even did my own sound effects when riding my pony on to stage. 'Pakara pakara pakara', apparently that's what Japanese horses say. Seriously.

For signed photos send 3.99 and a prepaid envelope.

Snow White meets the dwarves

'Mirror, mirror on the wall'

"Please don't kill me Hunter" Here comes the Prince to save the day

The final curtain

SNOWY MOUNTAIN

Well, it's got really cold here the last week or too. Afternoons are still hot and bright, but mornings and evenings are feeling like winter, and people are starting to put on their snow-tyres. I don't mind, I'm looking forward to the snow. My favourite mountain is now draped in a blanket of white (poetic huh?). I had a long longing look (catchy huh?) at it this morning before settling off for work. I think I'll take a study break this weekend and get up there to take some photos. I don't have my camera with me today, but you can trust me when I say it looks almost identical to this woodblock picture by Ando Hiroshige. Yeah, trust me :o)

PINK

Just realised I have no pink on my blog. Maybe I'm just procrastinating.

BUT WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?

So I'm doing a Japanese test in less than three weeks. Don't ask me why. I'm an idiot I know, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. My initial reasoning was that it would motivate me to study. I also thought passing the test would somewhat justify all the money I spent going to Japanese school last summer.

Well, it's not motivating, nor is it justifying anything. I did a past paper the other day and scored 30%. It wasn't a 'bad test' or 'just not my day' or 'too many careless mistakes'. Rather, I felt I did well getting as many questions correct as I did. The main problem is that I just don't know it. I don't have the knowledge. I know neither the grammar, nor how to use the particles, the verb forms, or the different kanji and how to read them. I've to know 1,500 words and 300 kanji, and probably have less than half that already squashed into my polluted brain. The listening is my weakest point, but I guess I'm also a bad listener in English. Too be completely honest I didn't really know what I was signing up for when I paid my test application fee, I just listened to everyone else (who hadn't even taken the test) saying 'yeah Mark, no problem, go for it'. Cheers!

Well I'm stuck with it now and I'll give it my best shot. Despite all the negativity on this page, I'm feeling optimisitic. Not so much because I think I've a chance at passing, but because I've been studying, and to that extent this whole ordeal has been worth while. Right? Right?

FOOT MASSAGE

This weekend I attended a foot massage lesson (in Japanese) at the community centre. I teach at the community centre once a week and the staff there are great. They always keep me up t0 date on the town activities and ask me to come along when I'm free. I knew some of the old ladies from my pottery classes were going, so I wasn't too scared to attend. I really just went for a laugh and to do the community thing, but it turned out to be really interesting. There was about twenty people, and they were all over the age of sixty. I wasn't expecting to learn much since it was in Japanese, but since the class was free and on a saturday morning I thought it would be good listening practice. However, the teacher was great. Very practical and there was more doing than talking. Five minutes into the two hour class and we all had our socks off rubbing cream into our pretty feet.

The man sitting next to me was ninety-five years old and the class joker. Recognising me as another joker, we bonded right away. He was so cool. With five gold teeth and a big smile, he kept the class in stitches with his antics and flirty remarks to our teacher.

I never knew much about reflexology before, but now I can ease my neck pain by rubbing a spot on my big toe for two minutes. It's pretty freaky actually. The teacher had us try to touch our toes, then rub a certain spot on our foot, then try again. The flexibility difference was amazing. We didn't go into all the different body parts that can be worked on, but it's certainly something I'd like to find out more about.

NEW SPORTS AND BLASPHEMY

It’s Thursday, so I’m back at the Elementary School. Despite being tired I’m happy to be around the kids. The energy is great. Today I’d three classes. Grade 5, 6 and Asunaro (special needs/slow learners). At break and lunch time the fourth grade gang called me out to play sports. Not content with introducing me to frisbee/dodgeball, they wanted to show me another hybrid sprort; baseball/soccer. It’s baseball rules, but you kick a soccer ball (football) instead of hitting a baseball. As usual it was a lot of fun and nice to be outside on this hot autumn day. Initially I was reluctant to show my real power. Naturally I’m afraid of hurting any of the kids after that incident last year.....(joke). But eventually my confidence rose and I kicked a homerun. Boy, did they go mad. I was so happy. All those years of being picked last for lunchtime football at school were washed away with a single kick. High fives all round and my childhood scars were healing quickly.

Shortly after my homerun, Yuta, one of my favourite fourth-graders came running over and said ‘You are God’. I laughed, thinking he was trying to say ‘You are good’. I corrected him, but he was adamant. ‘You are God’, he said again. I enquired further to which he said 'kamisama' which is the Japanese word for God. It was hilarious. I don’t even know where he learned it. Sure, I’ve taught that class ‘You are............’ followed by many flattering adjectives. But I’ve never taught them about God or even that word, so it was really funny. Then again, maybe little Yuta is smarter than I think and he’s taking the Mickey out of my long hair and beard. Photos: The Grade 4 Trouble Makers(bottom), Soccer/Baseball(middle), A big PEACE from Grade 2's Ami Chan(top)

GOIN' SOLO

Another long weekend has just passed. My plan was to have a cheap one since I've a long Christmas break coming up. Turned out to be a fun weekend hanging out with the new ALTs in my area. Had a couple of nice meals and went for a few games of bowling. Sunday I was hoping to do a bit of studying. But, when I got up, it was far too nice a day to waste doing something so trivial. And after a weekend's socialising I was looking forward to some Mark-time so I packed my stuff, jumped in the car and headed off to my favourite mountain. With the leaves past their peak beauty the roads were pretty quiet and I really enjoyed cruising along to some new tunes, stopping occasionally to take a few snaps.

This was to be my fifth time to climb Kurikoma-san, but my first time alone. Arriving at the carpark, I seen the weather wasn't so great higher up. But that was cool, I've already seen all the views and I was just out for some thinking time (what's the meaning of life, how can I save Africa, will I ever be able to grow a proper beard, etc).

I climbed the whole mountain from top to bottom and only saw three other people. The ending of the leaf-viewing season and the gathering clouds seemed to keep everyone away. It was perfect. I had a nice slow dander, stopping when I liked to take photos or make a hot coffee. It's gotten pretty cold here in Japan this last week or two and I was glad I packed my beanie and fleece. Hibernation time I think. Also my fear of bears seems to have subsided (maybe because of my new teddy bear) and I was able to relax and think about what to do next year.

The final section to the top was covered in dense mist/cloud. It wasn't unpleasant, just a little eerie. But when I finally made it to the top, it was actually quite spooky. Every time I've been here before, even when there were very few people on the trails, there where always large groups up top. This time, however, there was no-one. Not a single person. There was no view at all and even the summit post and direction signs were difficult to see. And the wind was picking up a bit too, making it all seem like something from a scary movie.

I found myself a sheltered spot and made some hot noodles. It was surprisingly relaxing, surrounded by mist and wind, being the only person on top of my favourite mountain. With my fleece and hat and rainproof jacket, and all the things you don't appreciate unless you've been stuck without them before, it was like being in my own little coccoon. Just waiting to become a beautifull butterfly. Waiting and waiting and waiting...

My belly full and thoughts more settled than they've been in a long time, I headed back. Taking a different trail on the return I soon caught site of something white and bobbing, coming at me through the mist. It was an old lady, or obaasan, as they're called out here. She was marching along at a great pace. A little strange looking though, with her hat seemingly made of old cut-up towels. We said our konichiwa's as we passed, but a couple of seconds later she shouted back to me. Asking me where I was from, I turned around and answered. Standing quite a distance apart we had a quick conversation in Japanese; where do you live, how long have you been here, what do you do, etc. It felt strange because we weren't standing close, so we were kind of shouting over the wind. I got the feeling she was hurrying to make it to the top (it was getting late) and didn't want to backtrack. This distance plus the towels on her head gave the whole situation a surreal and comical effect. When she shouted her final farewal remark, Nihon daisuke (You love Japan?), she dramatically flung her arms out to the side and bowed, like an old fashioned actress taking a bow. It was hilarious and had me chuckling all the way down the mountain.

The top.

LOCAL MOUNTAIN SNAPS

Which way's home? No wonder I'm always getting lost. Rope to pull myself up.
Surrounded by mountains.
Rope to lower myself down

My favourite, Mt. Kurikoma, off in the distance.

RIGHT IN MY BACKYARD

So there’s me driving all over the place to climb mountains not even realizing there was one in my own backyard. Now don’t get me wrong, I knew it was there, I’m not that daft…….(pause for thought/self-questioning). It’s just that I thought it was inaccessible because it appeared to be in the middle of a bunch of mountains. But as it turns out there is a road. Bumpy as hell, it’s the kind of ‘road’ you’d only drive in a Land Cruiser or an eleven year old Daihatsu hatchback. Being the owner of the latter I gladly put my exhaust and madness to the test again. This mountain is called Oodogemoriyama, or something like that, and is actually in my town. At a mere 580 metres, it’s not exactly Everest. But infamous for it’s super steepness (if that’s a word), and high population of bears, none of my local friends have climbed it. I climbed it alone on Monday. It was a beautiful afternoon with crisp autumn weather and perfect for some thinking time. Unfortunately, during my two hour hike, the only meaningful thoughts I had were ‘god, it’s steep’, and, ‘I hope a bear doesn’t eat me’. The steepness I could handle. With ropes tied to trees for most of the steep sections I could pull myself up without worrying too much about slipping on the bed of fallen leaves under my feet. But the bears, well, the bears really bugged me. I don’t mean they were calling me names or throwing paper airplanes at me like the kids in school. I mean I couldn’t get them out of my head and focus on useful thoughts like curing world hunger or what to cook for dinner (curing my hunger). Seriously, it almost became stressful at one point. Most of my hikes to date have been with other people, and usually in more open mountains. This was in the middle of the forest and the (far too) cheap bear-bell that I’d bought was bearly audible even to me.
But, alas, as this blog-post proves, I did not get eaten, or even nibbled on by a bear. However, I am buying a proper (i.e. costs more than 50p) bear-bell before climbing on my own again.

With maps like this I'll never get lost.